Trailer Park

A quick assessment of the state of things:

I have spent the last week writing, studying and editing.  I have managed to actually spend 4 days doing continuous work.  None of this was the Corporations Law paper, which leads me to believe that it's not me, but the Corps subject that is the problem.  I think I already knew that though.

Today I'd like to talk about White Feminism

Also known as egalitarian feminism, it ignores the subtle differences between each person, such as weight, colour, education, upbringing; generally context.  In other words, I see it as allowing bigotry, racism, and 'otherness' to run alongside feminist values.  White feminists applaud the banning of Chris Brown from coming to Australia, without acknowledging the nuances of his ban: that men can rehabilitate; that as a reformed abuser, speaking to hoards of young people, can be a seriously positive influence on the dialogue; and the racist undertones of a broadly white society banning a man of colour from entering the country.  I also feel sad.  Pete Doherty, someone who suffers from ongoing, extremely painful, and pervasive addiction issues (now, hopefully, reformed) was given a very restrictive visa for his Splendour in the Grass shows in 2013.  I have loved Pete as one of the greatest poets of our generation, was devastated when he cancelled coming to Australia with the Libertines in 2006, and I hate that I still haven't seen him.  Chris Brown, while I do not engage in this style of music, is surely held in the same regard by his millions of fan.  Also, where is the outrage from feminists about letting Geert Wilders have a visa for coming into the country?

It is somewhat like this horrifying argument that we should not build mosques.  Islam is portrayed by bigoted groups as being a terrifyingly alien set of values that is contradictory to western values, and therefore should not be made to feel welcome in Australia.  We know that this is pure bigotry.  Mosques represent community, and a strong Islamic community leads to inclusiveness.  It prevents radicalisation of young people, through strong leadership and support.  In other words, if you want Australia to be free of angry young Muslim men, build mosques, which are a part of the Australian landscape.

I appear to have fallen off the wagon.  Back onto white feminism.  I am a woman of colour, it is a name that I have recently incorporated into my identity.  The reason that I have is that it has been pointed out to me that my structure of reality is different to white people.  I never realised!  I asked 'why?' a lot, my Ego curious as to why I might be so compelling to other women of colour.  It is quite nice to be told 'No! You're actually special!'; I am aware that this is smoke and mirrors.  But the difference is that as a woman of colour, and as an unconventional woman, I can perceive the systems surrounding me.  I suspect part of this perception is my personality type (though I know plenty of people with my personality type that deny the systems, so these things aren't necessarily inclusive).  I think the core to the perception is as a person of colour (but again, there are people of colour who deny the systems, here's looking at you.  Also, plenty of people of all genders with the opposite personality type to me, who are white, perceive the systems.  So I don't know where it comes from.  Some people just can't.

But anyway, I'm also aware that it is not just my gender that has prevented so many opportunities from presenting, but rather a combination of factors: unconventionality being the prime suspect, closely followed by tall poppy syndrome, not-pretty-or-skinny-enough-to-hire-as-eye-candy, not being a yes person.  It is in combination, because any of these issues would be less of an issue if I was a man.  So intersectionality applies to me, I can see how it applies, and I have no idea how to conform in a way to negate the way that the system works against me.  I get angry and frustrated when I hear people, under the banner of 'feminism', tell us what we should do with our lives. Such as support female only rock bands.  Or grow / shave our armpit hair.  Or dress in a certain way.  I adore the concept of the 'bad feminist', who does what they want, when they want.  I certainly try and live in the world with Wilde in my mind: 'what other people think is none of my business'.  Part of it is coping mechanism; most of it is putting myself up really high moral standard of living and existing.  What more can I do?

One of the choices that I make is to listen to podcasts that could be characterised as white feminist podcasts.  I'm talking about Mia Freedman's company, Mamamia Women's Network.  I get genuinely excited on the nights of the week that the podcast is released.  I have no doubt that some of the feminists within the network are genuine intersectional feminists, such as Rosie Waterland, who is hilarious, and I look forward to reading her book once I have moved past the endless tide of law school readings.  I might even take myself to Asia for a fortnight and just read and read, along with the other biographies that I have piled up in my room (Neil Young, Morrissey).  Oh look I'm off track again.  My problem, primarily, is with Monique Bowley.  Monique produces all of the Mamamia podcasts, and randomly comes out with incredibly judgmental statements.  Such as 'I don't understand what the problem is with Rachel Donezel, surely we're able to express ourselves any way we want?'.  Mia Freedman herself is complicit in all of this.  I know that she has been criticised, over and over again, for her statements about prostitution, or her statements comparing gay people to pedophiles.  But there is pervasive ongoing personal body shaming, and the just... not the same care of language that I – and my friends – and I routinely pull them up on this – use.  And I feel bad for her, because she is so well intentioned.  But the constant slip ups that I hear on the podcasts speak to a louder problem of ongoing and pervasive internalised misogyny.  Mamamia can combat this so easily with putting to air more women of colour, and testing the podcasts against an audience of peers.  The thing is: I don't really mind hearing this stuff.  I roll my eyes in my bed, and have a giggle at their ignorance.  It really is compelling listening, and is analogous in feeling to catching up with school friends (which I never do, primarily because they don't seem to like me much).

On Body Shaming

I do have a problem with body shaming.  I have a problem with people around me doing it to themselves.  But I have it from other people in my life.  I can forgive my mother, because she has her own bucket of issues, and you can't really fight with parents.  But I have recently defriended someone close, who called me 'fat' in passing, and when I pulled her up on it, wouldn't own the statement.  She tried every angle to relinquish the guilt, to blame me, to blame society.  I would not have pushed her so hard on the matter, but for the incredibly standard that she holds everyone else in the world up against.  She genuinely hurt me, and I expect contrition, and a proper apology with ownership of the wrong, when these things happen.  It might be an excuse for me to end the friendship, because misanthropy is just really not much fun to be around.  Also, the borderline personality is so aggressively manipulative, and while I thought I was up for the challenge, ultimately it has hurt me.  The point at which I get accused of manipulation and abuse, not only for expressing my feelings, but also for the actions of my friends... that just takes personal responsibility a step too far.  I like to be able to navigate conflicting personalities, and I don't mind being caught between people that hate each other, although it is terribly unpleasant.  The minutes that I have to take responsibility for another person's action, I'm out.

Unfortunately there were a number of accusations levelled against my personality and integrity.  Unfortunately I have availed the person to some opportunities that involve my ongoing relationship with her.  Unfortunately I'm far angrier now, after the spouted her vitriolic bile at me.  What do I do?  That's rhetorical.

Ok, I have 3000 words to write on something I don't know much about.  Shannon out.